Tuesday, February 14, 2006

V Day, part deux

The supposed (to my way of thinking) one-night stand from Saturday emailed me the cutest (and not cheese at all) V-day message! I can now christen him B. I am not sure why I am so excited. Perhaps it's the Valentine's bottle of wine or Magnolia cupcake I've just consumed or maybe it's that he's actually hot, has a big dick (and definitely knows how to use it, plus I wasn't at all shy about letting him go down on me) is smart (Ivy League biz school out of town) and is just sort of cute and nice. Plus really tall and manly! I forgot to mention that when we walked out of the diner at 4 a.m. Saturday night some dude said something like "Power couple, make way!" and B. said, "What?" and the guy repeated it and B. was like, "Did you hear that?!" to me, and was psyched about it. I got a good feeling about it. Of course I was too drunk to remember it until he emailed me but...who knows about this all. Here I was just sitting around being drunk and semi-feeling sorry for myself when I got this little jolt of good news! yay for doing the right thing (aka, breaking up with M.).

Happy Valentine's Day, to me

I decided that I am dating myself tonight. I couldn't stomach spending tonight with one of my stalkers so I am heading out to buy myself a nice bottle of wine, some chocolate and steak and just hang out, watching movies and enjoying my own company. I really miss M.! I mean, I don't want to be with him and I know this is normal but yesterday at work I got kind of teary-eyed and emailed him at ike 9 a.m. (yeah, like he'd actually be up or something). I haven't heard back from him.

It's not as though we've had wonderful Valentine's memories or anything. The few we spent together were lackluster at best. Last year he took me out to a realy nice dinner but I was ridiculously sick and it was freezing rain outside and we got into a discussion about porn and of course I cried about the plight of women and we barely spoke for the rest of the night.

But yes, I miss him anyway. I did finally, FINALLY get laid this weekend! I met this really hot, sweet guy--a friend of a friend at a birthday party--and we danced all night and went out for breakfast and then went home and had hot sex. He was sooooo good and complimentary (thank GOD I'd had a premonition about wearing cute underwear) and we definitely enjoyed ourselves. However, I did not like sleeping next to him. He smelled nothing like M. and was a wierd sleeper. I woke up early the next day and lay there sweating and praying he would leave. So I woke him up and made him go. I am not sure if I will see him again (oh, did I mention he doesn't even live in NYC?) or if I even want to but either way he knows how to get in touch with me, so....we'll see.

In the meantime, I can't wait to get drunk and eat chocolates by myself tonight! I try not to keep wine in my apartment because I am afraid I will turn into more of an alcoholic than I already am but tonight is definitely an exception....

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Dry spell! dry spel!

I haven't had any fresh meat in a while. I am so not kidding when I say all of the previously mentioned dates keep calling and texting and their pathetic-ness makes me cringe. I am so mean and horrible but I guess this is just a venting venue. I am in seven freaking weddings this year. I have appointments to try on bridesmaids dresses and plan bachelorettes and showers and endless events and crap and I feel like I am destined to be on the proverbial always a bridesmaid never a bride bandwagon....

A couple of days ago, I kind of looked up to the sky and asked (God, or whomever), "How come I haven't found someone yet?!" and I am not sure if it was God answering back or my own wild imagination, but I did hear something along the lines that I will find someone but I have more important things to do with my life right now. Is that a sign from heaven or a sign of my on increasing insanity due to being single?

I haven't had sex in months. I used to laugh when I heard women complain about that shit but it's true: time really creeps up on you. Oh my God, I sound like a bitter hag. I'm not really that miserable I just want a sexy guy with god breath who is not a dork who I want to fuck then actually sleep in the same bed with! Is that too much to ask??!!